Sunday, April 17, 2011
Natsumi is Home!!
I hope whoever took her to the pound with the request to have her put to sleep gets to pay for his ruthless behavior. I will never not believe that she was a breeding dog. Who shaves a dog down to put them to sleep? Someone who is trying to hide all evidence of the shape the dog was in.
Natsumi has a lifetime full of joy, love and peace ahead of her. How lucky is she is. I think Carolyn and Carl are pretty lucky - she's a sweet, loyal girl and hopefully she can help ease their pain of the loss of Jasmine. One animal can never replace one that''s passed on. Another animal can distract us and help us smile while our heart is mending. They've taken to calling her Nachi. :)
This weekend I did a whole lot of nothing. It felt so good to just nap, watch tv and straighten up around the house. I was Miss Hermit and it felt wonderful. The past couple of weeks have been far too emotional for me - work was a monster and then I had some personal/family stuff I was facing. Everything is ok, but challenges need to be faced and this is no time for hiding my head in the sand. So, one weekend to kind of mentally prepare was the best thing I could have probably done for myself.
It's funny how guilty I can feel for not doing anything in regards to dog rescue or being a good daughter. I didn't need to be a good Mom because JTK was with his Dad. I did need to prevent myself from reaching out to someone I had mad angry. I'm a classic co-dependent people-pleaser. I know I made someone angry the other day in the process of basically protecting myself. I did nothing wrong and this person has been quite a bully to me. However, I knew I ticked them off and it took a lot of willpower to not contact them and make sure they weren't too mad or call my friends and try to get them to tell me I did the right thing. Screw it! I'm tired of not sticking up for myself. And I am certainly tired of scrambling for forgiveness when I do something that's in my own best interest while hurting no one.
Just like Natsumi - when she went to protect herself on our first meeting. I understood that she didn't know who I was and wasn't sure how I'd treat her. Once she saw how I treated her, she never had to protect herself against me again. Had I been awful to her, she would have continued to snap at me. If someone treats any of us bad, we have every right to protect ourselves from that kind of behavior. Luckily, I don't bite - I've just decided not to be a punching bag for the time being. :)